Live the life you love

Learn How Expectations Sabotage Our Happiness

Are You Sabotaging Your Happiness?

We often sabotage our happiness, wierd huh? Yes indeed we sabotage happy relationships and even our futures. Why we do this is based on sub concious thoughts that were planted in our minds as young children. Everything that we react and respond to is based on our personal experiences. I have seen it in three of my personal relationships where my guy either cheated or ran out of fear or expectations that I did not and could not meet. It was not until my therapist pointed it out that I finally was freed from sadness, guilt and shame.

Expectations are the root of heartache and yet most if not all of us have expectations. We have self imposed expectations, expectations for others, and others have expectations for us. We tend to have high expectations in relationships; both that they will last long term and for details to which I will return in a bit. We have high expectations for our personal success, parenting, and even reputation. To set ourselves up for success we need to understand the difference between expectations and realistic goals and values. It is a great trait to be self disciplined, but everything is filtered through our personal experiences in life. It is critical to be aware, accept the situation as it is knowing some, in fact most, things are out of our control, and forgive yourself.

I tend to snap yoga photos everywhere I go, not to impress any one, but because it’s a fun way for me to chronicle my trips. Not sure what I was going for with my leg lol. Just remember to have fun and spread good vibes!

I tend to snap yoga photos everywhere I go, not to impress any one, but because it’s a fun way for me to chronicle my trips. Not sure what I was going for with my leg lol. Just remember to have fun and spread good vibes!

Change Your Mindset~ Change Your Outcome

Change is never easy, but it is worth it. Without change we become stagnant and die. Once we learn to respond rather than react we can approach all situations with positivity. The Law of Attraction itself would agree that when we are capable of surrendering our expectations and responding positively great things will come. When you find yourself attached to an outcome, pause, breathe, and observe how you feel. If you feel stress, tension, or resentment adjust your mindset. Chances are if you are angry or disappointed you had the wrong motive in the first place.It is no joke learning to let go. Anyone who says they live completely free from expectation is kidding themselves, but we can all try a bit harder which will lead to increased happiness and decreased stress. Changing our mind set requires us to remain present. You hear many wise people and sages preaching about the power of now and that is because setting expectations is future based and blinds us of possibilities unfolding in the present moment.

Three examples:

If you want your husband to buy you flowers and he doesn’t. This creates dissapointment. The poor guy likely has no clue how badly you wanted the flowers. But your resentment will grow. Learn to use The Five Love Languages to communicate better. There may be things he wants too and he may feel the same dissapointment. Meanwhile, learn to buy yourself flowers. I mentioned earlier that expectations can seem impossible in relationships so try to communicate respectfully and openly with your partner.

If you agree to meet friends at a public event. I definitely struggle with anxiety so showing up alone at crowded venues makes me nervous, but allow yourself options. For example; maybe you have to park far away. You could consider turning around and going home or take an uber. If you cannot find your friends consider just being present and enjoying the event solo.

If you are working hard and expect a raise. Consider the fact that a raise may not be financially possible even though the company appreciates your hard work. Evaluate if you are doing what you love.

The colors on the Blue Ridge Parkway were amazing last weekend. Please remember that sometimes life’s disappointments are actually gifts. I was told this drive would be beautiful, but it surpassed my expectations.

The colors on the Blue Ridge Parkway were amazing last weekend. Please remember that sometimes life’s disappointments are actually gifts. I was told this drive would be beautiful, but it surpassed my expectations.

Aparigraha, WHAAAAAT?

Living yoga is not just a physical practice on the mat. It is a disciplined way of living as perscribed by the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali thousands of years ago. It takes daily practice both on and off the mat, but the goal is to reach enlightmenment, or ultimate bliss. Sounds good, right? Of course, but like all things great it does not come easy. Aparigraha is the 5th Yama in the 8 limbs of yoga. It means non possessiveness both physically and mentally. We live in a society plagued with the desire for more. But, it goes back to the principle that our expieriences are each personal. Someone who lives in poverty and has no roof over their head would be ecstatic with running water let alone a hot bath. Someone on the other hand who is affluent may turn their nose us at a Courtyard instead of a Ritz. Everything is relative and yet we all self impose expectations. When we see what and who we need verses what we do not we are then aware and able to move forward free from outcome. When we can observe each situation free from judement it opens to the door to unlimited possibilities.

We can never truly posses anything that is not meant to be ours. Jeleousy is a dangerous game where we never win. Envy is similar. So let go of outcomes and possessions. Live from a heart centered  place rather than an ego driven one. Take only what you truly need. Give love when you can and take some when your cup is low. When we have faith that the universe provides what we need when we need it the stress dissipates and life becomes abundant. As you enjoy the autumn leaves and all their glorious color remind yourself that just as their leaves fall we too need to let go.

Peace and Joy,

Libby

Taking time out for yourself, especially in nature, is a great way to nourish your body, mind, and soul!

Taking time out for yourself, especially in nature, is a great way to nourish your body, mind, and soul!

Are You Working for the Weekend, or Living the Life You Love Every Day?

The phrase TGIF is commonly used to celebrate the beginning of the weekend where we drown our sorrows of the week and party until Monday when we fall back into the dreaded routine of the daily work grind. Sound familiar? This is not living! Wake up friends! Step off the hamster wheel and start to truly enjoy every day, not just the magic of  Fridays!  

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It is important to find simple pleasures and live with a grateful heart. The majority of our life takes place Monday through Friday so let's enjoy that time. Consider a job doing something that you love! And if that is not possible, schedule activities with friends and family during the week that allow you to truly connect and enjoy sharing positive energy. Try not to have these activities be anything draining. For example, if you are constantly running kids to athletic practices, schedule a night where they carpool and you do something relaxing and fun! Take it easy on yourself.  

I go back to my principal roots - practice AWARENESS: know when your stress levels are rising and take a break! Practice ACCEPTANCE: allow yourself to have fun and quiet time during the week. Practice FORGIVENESS: forgive yourself for working so much, or for whatever you need to personally forgive... this is a constant journey.  

Life is meant to be lived. Sometimes it is only through devastating events like death or divorce that we realize the things we missed out on. Please, do not wait until it is too late. Treasure each moment each day! You are so worth it! Honor your inner child at every age!

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Time is precious!  You can always make money, but you can never get time back. And remember that happiness is an inside job, In other words, it's an emotion that we chose to express. So make time and space to do things that truly make you happy! 

Wishing you an inspiring life and hoping that this inspiration carries you into a week that you look forward to living! Be it through music, food or a bouquet of flowers, simple little things each day can make a big difference. Live, love, laugh EVERY DAY like it was Friday!  

 

Live the Life you Love, Love the Life you Live,  

Libby

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Energy Exchange: The Law of Attraction and You

You are energy. Everything you do has an equal and opposite reaction. When you put out energy, it comes back. That is the law of attraction. When you are attracted to a particular person it is because you see similar qualities of yourself. It is very magnetic. The same goes with negative qualities. When you are angry or upset with someone likely, not always, you might be deep down upset with yourself.

When we slow down and think about this energy exchange it really helps us understand relationships. It makes us want to stay positive. You see, it is not about what you want! It is about being happy with what you have, because then you will attract what you want! Let go of the outcome and stay in the present moment radiating love and joy. You will then attract all that you could want and need. It is manifesting, the law of attraction,  and autosuggestion

Write down as many positive things as you can think of in your life! Positive qualities about your friends and co-workers, positive qualities about yourself, things you're grateful for. Then write down a few things that you want to manifest. Perhaps you want to attract the love of your life... Write it down. Maybe you want to attract wealth... Write it down. Maybe you want better health... Write it down. Whatever you want or need, write it down. The universe WILL provide them to you if your energy is set to the right vibration!!! The magic is within you!  

Our thoughts will not always be positive. We are human. When a negative thought comes, simply be aware and examine what is bothering you. Try not to dwell there. Turn it around into something positive. We can always look on the bright side if we choose. Our mind is a powerful tool!  

Happy Friday Everyone! I hope your energy is high and you keep the momentum spiraling upward! Surround yourself with other positive inspiring people and rise above the negativity that is weighing our world down. Be the Change!  

Good Vibes Only, 

Libby